One of the difficult things to teach in the parish community is to show how family life is what we find in our parish communities.
Now, everyone in a regular family knows that there are relatives that are cooperative and enjoyable to be with. And then, there are others who are more difficult but we would rather describe these hard-to-deal-with relatives as people that are an “acquired taste.”
In every family clan there are wonderful people, difficult people and one or two with whom you are always on guard when in their presence. But they are all family! Wise people learn how to deal with the more difficult and crusty members of our clan.
The Church (local parish community) is no different. We are composed of all types of personalities, histories, ethnic background and some very different levels of toleration with other people.
There are wounds, misunderstandings and plenty of unforgiveness. We are so human – and at times, so sinful toward each other.
This is why the command of Jesus to love one another means that we try to build bridges of understanding, respect and acceptance of the members that are different from ourselves. At the same time as we are trying to build bridges, these “different” members are probably trying to understand and respect you!
When we accept that the parish community is such a human family with so many imperfections, and not a community of perfect human beings, we can tolerate the misunderstandings and hard feelings. But like any healthy family we do not leave it there. We are trying to build new bridges towards those who are hurt, alienated or feeling pushed to the edges of he parish.
Our life in the parish is being challenged by the reality of God. There are people in our parish that you may never invite into your house, but the reality is God loves and wants those people. We have to struggle with the deep love of God for the lost, forgotten and the unwanted. God is so beyond us, and always, so challenging!
We are also challenged to try to see in others their honest and best efforts to live authentic lives. They may be a long way from perfection but they are trying their very best. You and I may have struggles with their efforts, which we judge to be inferior, but God sees the heart. God sees that they are doing the best they can!
It is always a mistake for one parishioner to walk away or quit the church because they cannot accept the ‘inferior’ person. In a healthy family we do not quit because some are difficult, we learn to cope and to accept. In the parish community we learn to accept and grow in the love of God for that one difficult person or family.
Take some time to inform God of the good and the difficult that you experience in your parish community. And then allow God to inform you how and why he loves these people so much!
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